Monday, April 28, 2008

to the brim

i love to drink stuff.

now, let me clarify that--what i mean is, i'm almost always thirsty and almost never without water or a coke or something. my 2 nalgene bottles are my constant companions. i literally drink around 4 liters of water a day on average, plus cokes and coffee and what not. and when i go out to eat, i pretty much cannot order something if it isn't going to have free refills--it's just not worth it because i'll drink it within 2 minutes and then be thirsty the rest of the meal. there's really only one person i know that drinks more than i do, and that's my friend jared, who has been known to carry around a 2 liter coke the same way most people carry around a 20 ounce.

anyway, when i pour myself something to drink, especially coffee, i ALWAYS fill the cup up as much as possible. most people would probably say it's too full actually, because i like to get the liquid right up to the brim. get every drop possible, i guess. actually, i never really thought it was weird until other people started pointing it out, usually when i'd serve them something and they'd be shocked by how full the glass was.

but i say all this because i think i'm learning that this is how i really love to live. get everything possible. down to the last drop. to the brim. i love moments that are full and alive and exciting--i think i could just live in those moments forever, and last night was a great example.

it's not that i did anything exciting yesterday. really, i don't know how to describe it, because i'm still processing it myself, but i'll try.

yesterday was a day of good conversations. i drove/rode in the car about 9 hours. first from dallas to west monroe, with friends, and then west monroe to lafayette by myself. i had some great conversations in the car, pretty much the whole way--both with my friends i was riding with, and then on the phone and with God later. good, meaningful, real conversations. answered prayers. realizations of deeper things--kind of like waking up spiritually.

then when i got back to lafayette, it was just about 7 pm, right after church and just in time for dinner at the college house. one house, full of all these people i love and am getting to know and so so SO many good conversations. my good friends from my small group. old friends. new people--even 2 girls from thailand. older adults who've cooked for us and have great stories to share and are so loving and gracious. funny stories. awkward moments. meeting new staff members and getting excited about the future, the potential, what the Lord is going to do.

it was so simple, and yet so amazing. that's the kind of stuff that i just want to fill life up to the brim with. i was talking to my friends after and trying to explain to them the joy i felt, but it was just about impossible to put to words. they could see it in my face, but how to describe that kind of joy...i don't know!

i mean, honestly, the past 9 months of my life have been probably the best so far. not the easiest, but the best, the fullest. God has taught me so much and grown me and is so amazingly working in and around me and sometimes all i can think is, are you kidding me? really? seriously?

He is good, folks. really. and my heart is just bursting these days with it all. joy beyond words, to be able to look at life, the good and the bad, the fun and the messy, and see the bigger picture. to choose to rejoice and love it. it's not just a moment or an experience, it's a totally freeing way of viewing life, and i'm loving it.

don't know how much sense that all makes, but i think that's about as good as i can get it into words. amazing.

1 comment:

Tiffany Martin said...

Im definitely excited about everything that is happening!! I know how you feel though, its as if you want to just burst with all of this joy and love and spread it to everyone and hope they feel God's love just the same as you! =) Its just amazing! It really is!